How to bear an offence

When another offends thee — bear it; have compassion on him who has offended thee, for he has sinned. Hast thou been insulted? Try somehow to turn him who did it towards the good, and show him the example of it thyself. Abba Poemen said: “Evil will in no wise root out evil; therefore, if anyone does thee evil, render him good, that by good thou mayest root out the evil.”

Once mother Theodora asked Theophilus, patriarch of Alexandria, what the apostle's word meant: “Redeeming the time” (Eph. 5:16). The patriarch answered: “The apostle's words point to profit. If they revile thee, redeem that time with humility, and thou shalt gain profit for thy soul. If thou art in dishonour — redeem that time with patience, and again thou shalt gain profit. So that, if we will it, we may turn every unpleasantness to our own profit.”

“...Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you” (Matt. 5:44), — the Lord has commanded us.

A certain noble man, having borne reviling, said to the reviler: “I could have answered thee with the like reviling, but the law of God sets a bridle upon my lips.”

A certain monk asked Abba Poemen: “What dost thou counsel me to do, father?” — “Be a friend to him who offends thee,” answered the elder.

The holy Abba Dorotheus teaches us thus: “Believe that dishonour and reproach are medicine for the soul, which heals the pride of thy soul. Pray for those who reproach thee as for true physicians. He who flees from the one who insults him flees from humility.”

If thou feelest that grief and anger are taking hold of thee when they insult thee, keep silence and utter not a word until by unceasing inward prayer thy heart grows calm; and only after this mayest thou speak with him who has insulted thee.